"RotaryLover" (rotarylover)
07/30/2014 at 22:20 • Filed to: None
2
39|
"RotaryLover" (rotarylover)
07/30/2014 at 22:20 • Filed to: None | 2
| 39 |
RUN! Because shit will be fucked up. This happened yesterday.
I was offered some food at first and a movie, which I accepted. Great Viet food...but then my stomach started making sounds and then I wanted to fart bad! I kept it in as long as I can.
Then she invited me to go out with her friends. Which I accepted too but I had to pick them out far away. She got her license suspended but her car was licensed and insured. I farted my life outside and we took her 2001 Accord 5 spd to get them. We go far away to get them and go to the other side of the town at the second appartment of the girl (dont ask, she is legitimately insane). This is where I found out that I'm with a bunch of low class theives (with loaded parents) minus an Hong Kong guy that came in to study in Canada who was the only sane guy there...They just went in the convenience store and stole 5$ worth of chips and a redbull. Been there and done that at quite a young age but I grew up pretty fast out of it. Her friends were 2-3 yrs younger than me and they still did it...smdh.
In the end, the friends (or shall I call them couple) fought verbally at least 10 times. The guy almost left us as he was waiting at a bus stop despite having zero money nor cellphone, claiming that he would take a taxi.
Now it was 4 am, I wanted to leave because I was plain tired of the bullshit and was up since 7 am yesterday. I had to use the girl's car to get back to her other place and get back to my car so I can go to sleep. The girl refused as she wanted to stay and continue her chilling and also wanted to sleep in this place. I was pissed and she gave me a back/chest massage to calm me down and stay. It almost worked as I suddenly felt asleep but her friends woke me up and I left with her car and her friends.
Second moral of the story, driving a 2001 5 spd Honda Accord makes my MX-5 AWESOME to drive right after!
TheBaron2112
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 22:24 |
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Lemme unpack that study for you.
It wasn't farts. It was H2S, also known as hydrogen sulfide. A common ingredient in farts.
Now, I'm in the wastewater industry. So I know hydrogen sulfide as the stuff that will kill you if you breathe it in if it's above a certain level in confined spaces. It's in farts, and it's in wastewater pipes and infrastructure because it's a byproduct of human waste.
Brian Silvestro
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 22:31 |
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Wut did I just read.
Nibby
> TheBaron2112
07/30/2014 at 22:32 |
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That sounds like a ... shitty job.
Jeff-God-of-Biscuits
> Nibby
07/30/2014 at 22:35 |
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I shit you not.
HideyoshiJP
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 22:35 |
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ptak appreciates old racecars
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 22:37 |
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wat
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RotaryLover
> TheBaron2112
07/30/2014 at 22:37 |
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The more you know :O
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RotaryLover
> Brian Silvestro
07/30/2014 at 22:38 |
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How my last night went....
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Brian Silvestro
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 22:39 |
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I thought Canadians were nice....
Money Hustard
> Brian Silvestro
07/30/2014 at 22:40 |
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I was piss and she gave me a back/chest massage to calm me down and staym.
I'm calling it: QOTY
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RotaryLover
> HideyoshiJP
07/30/2014 at 22:40 |
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I've seen so much stuff that I can leave earth with no indifference.
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Brian Silvestro
> Money Hustard
07/30/2014 at 22:41 |
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You might be on to something.
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RotaryLover
> ptak appreciates old racecars
07/30/2014 at 22:41 |
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Yeah...Don't go out with crazy...
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RotaryLover
> Money Hustard
07/30/2014 at 22:42 |
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I was tired as hell when I wrote this lol.
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RotaryLover
> Brian Silvestro
07/30/2014 at 22:44 |
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She gave me a massage...that was nice!
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Money Hustard
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 22:44 |
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That went no where, and passed the limits of decency when it comes to grammar and spelling.
In fairness, you do open the article with "RUN!" So shame on me, I guess.
First time I've seen the phrase "back/chest massage" mentioned on Oppositelock.
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Brian Silvestro
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 22:45 |
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Canadians man....
Crocket Bernet
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 22:45 |
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I have no idea what I just read.
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RotaryLover
> Money Hustard
07/30/2014 at 22:51 |
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Told you, I wrote this right after it happened and decided to post it in the future. I was sleeping while writting it.
blacktruck18
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 22:56 |
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Sooooo..... you didn't fart on her?
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RotaryLover
> Brian Silvestro
07/30/2014 at 22:56 |
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At least I was not found in a maple syrup can...
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Money Hustard
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 22:57 |
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Well, never hurts to read through a post the next day:)
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RotaryLover
> Crocket Bernet
07/30/2014 at 22:57 |
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My night time yesterday.
AMGtech - now with more recalls!
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 23:08 |
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I don't know what these other guys are talking about, I enjoyed reading this (and by reading this I mean looking at the picture of the hot Asian chick).
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RotaryLover
> blacktruck18
07/30/2014 at 23:21 |
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LOL no! I'm not as cray as her!
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RotaryLover
> AMGtech - now with more recalls!
07/30/2014 at 23:23 |
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If you wanna have an idea how she looks.
Almost exactly like her!
CCC (formerly CyclistCarCoexist)
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 23:29 |
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The Hong Kong canadians....sometimes you can only say WTF, slap yourself a few times, twiddle on your shifter, and drive off.
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Crocket Bernet
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 23:32 |
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I hope your night made more sense in real life than it does on paper, because this made about as much sense as Memento if you think the whole thing is taking place in order.
Manwich - now Keto-Friendly
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 23:36 |
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The key to farting on a date is pretend you're showing off by rolling down your window and cranking up the stereo while in motion.
The loud stereo will mask the noise and with the window open, the smell will get sucked out the window as long as you're moving.
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RotaryLover
> Crocket Bernet
07/30/2014 at 23:37 |
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It did. That's word by word what happened.
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RotaryLover
> Manwich - now Keto-Friendly
07/30/2014 at 23:38 |
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It wasn't even a date. I was fixing her car lol. But thanks for the tip!
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Manwich - now Keto-Friendly
> RotaryLover
07/30/2014 at 23:50 |
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Well it doesn't matter if it was a date even if it sounded like it turned into one... the approach is the same.
Now of course if you're with the guys and you have to get them back for something they did to you, that's when you roll up the windows, hit the button that turns off the passenger power window controls, lock the doors and give that massive sulfuric ass-burning fart the freedom it was asking for.
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RotaryLover
> Manwich - now Keto-Friendly
07/30/2014 at 23:59 |
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You're evil...
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Manwich - now Keto-Friendly
> RotaryLover
07/31/2014 at 00:01 |
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... yet happy!
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AMGtech - now with more recalls!
> RotaryLover
07/31/2014 at 01:57 |
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Worth it. Probably. Life wouldn't be worth living if you never took any risks.
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RotaryLover
> AMGtech - now with more recalls!
07/31/2014 at 04:19 |
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She goes to the mental institute where my parents are working....it's not worth it.
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AMGtech - now with more recalls!
> RotaryLover
07/31/2014 at 10:12 |
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Oh, yeah, you have a pretty good point there. That's more risk than I would be willing to take.
offyatindy
> RotaryLover
07/31/2014 at 11:51 |
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So, when are you seeing her again?
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RotaryLover
> offyatindy
07/31/2014 at 11:59 |
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I do have to give her key back...probably that time. After that, I'll never see her again. She's too much.